Thursday, October 07, 2004  

All Set.

Finally got Andrew to agree on our Halloween costumes for this year. I'm pretty excited about mine, as it involves blood, scabs, bruises and Campbell's soup.

Mysterious, huh?

Here's some hints:

I will not be going as "Paris The Heiress" (which, incidentally, is completely sold out in size Small, which I find pretty hilarious because who is going to effectively pull off a Medium Paris or a Large Paris? Or, even a Small, really. There seems to be no Extra Extra Small.)

I will not be going as a Garden Gnome, although if I were inclined to wear face masks this would be a pretty good costume.

I will not be going as Strawberry Shortcake, who apparently had some issues, left the Strawberry Patch and became a pole dancer.

I will not be going as a Vaguely Disappointing Low Rent Pimp. (though it is in the clearance Sale section)

I will not be going as a Doggie Dressed as a Rag Doll. No matter how cute it is. Sorry.

Andrew and I have said for the past three years that we wanted to go as a Flipper and a Flapper but we had no idea how to make a dolphin costume. But, as the dolphin costume is a cool $695 we will not being going as this either.

I will not be going as a Patriotic Woman With Huge Boobs. (Do you think she's for Bush or Kerry?)

I will not be going as a Woodland Fairy...even though I loved the idea when I read about it in Budget Living magazine two years ago. For some reason Andrew thinks dressing as a Woodland Fairy would make him appear less than manly. I disagree. Everyone knows Fairies are hot.

I will not be going as a Country Girl because come on, I live in Georgia and already dress like this everyday. Where would the fun in that be?

And lastly, Andrew and I will definitely not be going as a "Nuts and Bolts" couple because really, what could be filthier and more obscene?

| posted by Mary | 10/07/2004 04:03:00 PM
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