Wednesday, January 26, 2005  

She Disappears and Reappears....Just Like Magic!

This whole work thing is really getting in the way. I am just boring these days, overworked and tired. I have now broken my new year's resolution of posting something every weekday and that just sucks. I thought about going back in time and posting but isn't that kind of cheating? So, in case anyone is still reading this, a timeline of what's been going on the last week:

Thursday: Nothing really happened on Thursday. I worked a lot. Then I worked some more. Then I went home and complained to Andrew about how much I have to work lately.

Friday: Friday night Andrew and I took dinner to one of his co-workers that just had a baby. I'm good with the taking dinner to new parents thing but was slightly annoyed that Andrew had agreed to do this on a Friday night and even more annoyed when he told me that the co-worker wanted us to "hang out for a while." We showed up at 7:00 with our twice-baked mashed potatoes, green beans, ham and cream cheese brownies. We sat around in the living room drinking beer and watching the baby scream (the new mom didn't drink beer but looked like she was dying for one). Two beers later the co-worker's husband went to the bathroom that was just outside the living room. He peed what must have been gallons of liquid for about five solid minutes and there was this resounding pee noise filling the living room. We already know I have issues with pee noise. Andrew and I tried to talk loudly over the pee but it didn't help. We had a few more drinks. I couldn't hold it in any longer. I went into the living room-adjacent bathroom and used my patented "toilet crouching position" that guarantees a nearly silent pee. I've perfected this technique after many tries to pee quietly in our office restroom. You have to sit on the very front of the toilet seat and let the pee trickle down the side of the bowl. It totally works. Except Friday night. The co-worker's toilet apparently has a large gap between the seat and the bowl and about halfway through I realized that I was in fact peeing all over the co-worker's floor. The nice shiny hardwood floor. Completely horrified, I stopped midstream and scrambled to (quietly) mop up the bathroom floor with toilet paper. I came out of the bathroom and tried to play it cool. About ten minutes later we finally left and I turned to Andrew in the car and said, "I just pissed all over your co-worker's bathroom floor." His response? "That is so awesome! That is so...rock star! Yeah! Piss on the floor! Rock and roll!"

Saturday: Saturday I went into work, did stuff around the house and went to Milledgeville to spend that night with my friend Katherine. Upon my arrival at her house I hugged her hello and immediately hightailed it to the bathroom to pee (in the toilet this time, not on the floor). When I came out of the bathroom Kat and her husband were standing right outside the door (could they hear everything?), looking all weird. Then Kat handed me a paint chip and said, "We're trying to figure out what color to paint the nursery." Nursery? Huh? Holy crap! After much screaming and hopping up and down and hugging I realized that Kat is now the fourth one of my friends to have a baby and now I feel Officially Grown-Up. I am thrilled for Kat, she has been trying to get pregnant for a while and it is great news. She was taking a fertility drug the last few months and finds out this week if she is carrying more than one baby. I reassured her that if she had quintuplets or something that they can just divvy the babies up among our friends and Andrew and I would take at least one.

Sunday: I went to a baby shower for my friend Beth, which was nice and fun and all but made me feel kind of weird and introspective on my drive back to Atlanta. Everything has changed all the sudden and my friends are becoming parents. Parents! I've always known I wanted to have a child one day but it still freaks me out. Part of me feels the biological urge to reproduce and another part of me wants to leave the baby shower to go dance on top of a bar somewhere and do hard drugs and get a skull tattoo on my bicep and do all the other things that mean that you are Definitely Not All Grown-Up. Does anyone else feel this way?

Monday: Work, work, work, workedy work. Think about babies and alternately, hard drugs and biker bars.

Tuesday: We met one of our Single Male Friends (a dying breed) for dinner and drinks last night. He spent half of the evening calling up other friends and trying to get them to meet us out and then berating them and calling them losers after he hung up. It dawned on us that we must be losers to him all the time and we were only spared the title last night because we were actually out with him. Huh.

Wednesday: So far today I've done some work and wrote a long, self-indulgent post about where I've been the last few days.

And that's about it. Whew.

| posted by Mary | 1/26/2005 11:16:00 AM
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